Tip Sheet
10 Signs of a Domestic Abuser
1. Insanely Jealous (doesn’t want anyone, especially other men, to look at the victim or compliment her)
2. Possessiveness (If I can’t have her, no one will!)
3. Controlling behavior
a. Isolating the victim from others
b. Telling the victim what she can or cannot wear
c. Telling the victim when to come home every time she goes out
d. Ordering the victim to tell him her whereabouts at all times
e. Limiting who the victim can talk to
4. Embarrassing the victim in front of others or demeaning her
5. Short temper (victim can’t talk back to the abuser or else…)
6. Physical Assaults
7. Force the victim to have sex (even when she says no)
8. Twist the victims words around to start a fight
9. Frequent arguments with victim and/or others
10. Constantly contacting or calling the victim (even at work)
Tip Sheet
10 Signs of a Domestic Violence Victim
1. Visible bruises or injuries with questionable explanations
2. Wearing Long sleeves and pants in the summertime
3. Frequent wearing of sunglasses (even indoors)
4. Over protectiveness of the abuser
5. Frequent absenteeism and tardiness from work
6. Unusual quietness and signs of being withdrawn
7. Frequent calls, texts, emails, etc. from the abuser
8. Unexpected, disruptive visits to the workplace of the victim by the abuser
9. Noticeable fear of the abuser
10. Signs of depression or anxiety, (including crying and/or emotional outbursts)
Checklist of Things to take with You when You Leave Your Abuser
Identification for Yourself and Your Children, Pictures (if possible showing your injuries) Video Tapes, Journals or Diary (it is very important that you to keep an accurate record of the abuse)
Birth and Marriage Certificates
Legal Documents such as Order of Protection and Police Reports
Social Security Cards (Yours and Your Children’s), write down or remember the abuser’s, if possible
Money (Try to always have money saved. In community property states, you can legally take half of any money held in joint accounts. (The abuser can close them and you may never get your share, if you don’t take the money when you leave)
Checkbook, Bankbooks (Joint or Personal), ATM Cards, Pension and 401K Documents and Pay Stubs (Yours and the Abuser’s)
Credit Cards (those held jointly and separately)
Copies of unpaid bills, receipts, credit card statements, etc.
Keys to the car(s), house, lockbox, storage building, etc.
Registration and Title to Car(s), the abuser’s license plate number and car information
Medication and Medical Records
Passport, Will, and recent photographs of the abuser
Mortgage Documents, Loan Agreements and Insurance Documents, Deed to your house
